log In
A-Z categories
Home
Community
Night Life
Shopping
Services
Sport
About
Members
Local News
Going Underground
Batala Drums in Liver
Burlesque at the Lati
Did the earth move fo
Manhattans reunion
Karva Checkpoint
Car smash in Albert R
Two Men shot outside
National News
BAFTA Win For Jungle
The Cat in the Hat fi
Cannabis reclassifica
Anti-war invite issue
M.P.attacks Blairs co
Irradiated food rejec
Bag tax for shoppers
Prison not working
Fake News
Top prize abandoned
France vanishes
New ps3 game released
Leopard eggs!
Ramraiders strike est
Drug couriers warn of
Ainsdale noise tracke
Another baby clowned
Video News
Online Video News

2005-01-27 23:00:14
Drug couriers warn of rising prices

Report by Amy Ditupp BSc(Hons)

Merseyside drug couriers yesterday warned of rising prices due to lack of public transport. Mr X said I always use the train as it has a lower environmental impact than my BMW and is much more economical, but if Im going to be arrested at Southport train station for simply trafficking drugs, Ill have to use my car.
The comments from Mr X, who spoke exclusively to one of our many reporters, come as British Transport Police launched their clampdown on people bringing drugs into town by train. A Merseyside dealer who wanted to be known only as A really nice guy with the best deals this side of the Wirral confirmed Mr Xs comments, I cant keep my prices low-low-low if I have to pay for petrol, road tax, car insurance and munchies. A daily saveaway rail travel pass was up until now the cheapest way to do my deliveries and Id always arrive on time. I enjoyed the journey too, I like to slip off my shoes.
A local freelance economist has also predicted that if all the druggies stop using the train, rail prices for the ordinary law-abiding commuter may have to rise to compensate.

This is satire, its made up, not real.
<< Back [0:4]


If you have any problems with this website tell the technical team

All content (text/images/audio) copyright. Any replication is forbidden.
southportnews.com southportnews.co.uk southportclubs.com
southportnightlife.com southportnightlife.co.uk liverpool.gb.com

Terms and conditions